


I'm Only Human

by LemonyDave



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, F/F, I didn't really smut for this, M/M, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, Voyeurism, sorry to dissapoint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2019-05-09 07:44:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14711967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LemonyDave/pseuds/LemonyDave
Summary: Kellam is sad because he can't experience love because of his invisibility problems. But does that justify what comes next?





	I'm Only Human

The Shepherds are a colorful group-- a veritable rainbow of quirks. Plenty of pretty and beautiful hues to choose from. ...I’ve always had problems with visible light.  


The metaphor is getting out of hand. The fact that I am living in a beauty pageant is great, don’t get me wrong, but when objects of affection cannot see their admirers it presents more than a small problem. I am… invisible. People’s eyes go right over my form, even in loud clanking armor. I have to try and make myself seen. Exert effort to be noticed. Outside of my armor? Forget it. I don’t want much in life. I just want someone to look for me. To try and see me. But… everyone gets into their pairs and are happy. And I am happy for them, but my own soul feels cold. Why would a girl ever go for someone so unnoticeable? They wouldn’t. Girls want to have Chrom’s. Someone that they can’t help but to be drawn to. Someone with magnetism. I have… no such thing. I am alone, and destined to stay that way. Destined to fade into the background. To be forgotten.  


My unwanted power is something I have come to live with. I am not naturally a bitter person. I can adapt to anything. Although… I have gotten into my fair share of awkward situations because of it. A few in particular stand out to me. I am not naturally a perverse person, but I was forced one day, rather abruptly, into voyeurism.  


I was taking a bath under the moonlight, basking in the stars’ glory, when I heard the sound of two voices approaching. The sound of Chrom’s voice echoed throughout the bath:  


“Robin… this is wrong.”  


“Chrom,” Robin’s masculine tenor replied. “If this is wrong, then Everything I have ever known since waking up has been wrong.”  


“I am the Exalt. I have responsibilities to Ylisse now. I’m not just some Prince who can love and marry who he wants. Not anymore. I have to provide an heir.”  


“And you can. I know your heart belongs to me as surely as I am the wind at your back and the sword at your side.” Robin chuckles. They are both in view now. Very naked. It was appropriate. It was the bath. What wasn’t was how close they were.  


“We are going to have to do something about… us. To hide it.”  


“I know. I have a strategy.”  


“You always do.”  


They… began… fucking. It was passionate. Right in front of me. I didn’t dare move. How could I? Even as I was becoming a prune, I didn’t dare move a muscle. This was a confusing time for me. I felt so out of place. But the love on their faces was something I envied. Something I wished I could have. Something I knew was… impossible to obtain. No one could look at me the way that those two looked at each other because no one could see me. It was laughable. But their faces were… beautiful. It was like art. Water and the smell of sex filling the room, their faces, partially obscured by steam were in rapture. Breath coming in a staccato with the slapping of flesh. The experience… being in the middle of it… I didn’t belong there. It was something I could never own myself.  


I reclassed into a thief at Robin’s behest the next day. I couldn’t meet his eyes, not that he noticed. Chrom acted like nothing happened the night before, but everything seemed clear through the lens of the night previous. The future of the kingdom was being spearheaded by these two men-- these two lovers separated by the necessity of duty. It was almost as poetic, almost as sacred and holy as what I had witnessed the night before. It was tragic, their happiness private and theirs alone.  


What did that make me? A Thief? A parasite feeding off of the residual happiness of two men that should not be mine? Living vicariously through the ones that were allowed by Naga to love instead of being cursed by this damned invisibility? I hate it. I hate living in this loud world of chatter and noise that I barely live on the fringe of.  


I wonder if someone would notice if I died in battle. I wonder if anyone would care. I wonder if anyone would care if I killed myself. Or if they would just notice that their cups stopped spontaneously filling in the mess hall.  


My life is silent, but I saw joy. I felt it in those fleeting moments in the bath house that night. I need it. I need to feel it again. I need to see the love and joy on their faces again. It is like a drug, joy. You always want more of it, but for me it is an illegal substance.  


I suppose I am a thief in every sense of the word now.  


I did not just steal from Chrom and Robin. I walked past Marrbelle’s tent and heard it. Heard the gasps. Heard the muffled moans. Smelled it. That familiar scent of sex. A hole the size of an eyeball was utilized and I saw the pair. Maribelle and Lissa moving across one another with the desperation inherent in copulating. The need, the wanton desire for one another in each eye. I drank it in. The emotion. The atmosphere.  


…  


I wasn’t caught. Of course I wasn’t. Two weeks, there was a double wedding. Lissa with Robin, and Maribelle with Chrom. Everyone was happy for the couples. Myself included, knowing the truth. What I knew could bring the kingdom to its knees. What I knew could buy me a cush lifestyle. What I knew could give me what I wanted. Someone watching me. Someone noticing me.  


I never told. Of course I didn’t. I care for my friends. I love my friends more than I love myself. My desires are ultimately like me. Background to the bigger story playing out. They are more important. More important than Kellam.  


But when night falls, I often sleep little. My eyes peering into their rooms watching them fuck, watching them sleep. Drinking in the emotion of both. Drinking something besides this emptiness that fills me when I am away from it. I am not a good man. I am a wall with eyes, watching. Drinking in what it cannot have. Because as much as I want to turn from them, to forget the euphoria they own and turn back to my cold lonely life of translucence and loneliness…  


I’m only human.


End file.
